Dinner with the Pope's

Dear Cole,

Last night Uncle Derrick and family came over. Dad cooked up a yummy batch of spaghetti, with hot sausages and super slow simmered sauce. It was deliciouso! We finished off with some brownies with strawberries and whipped cream.

You actually played with Eliana and at one point were climbing over the back of the couch and Eliana was trying to copy you. A conversation went something like this:

Aunt V: Elle, please don't do that.
Cole to Elle: it's ok, you can do it when she isn't looking.

Way to teach your cousin the ropes.

Thanks for the company guys. We love you bunches.

The Old Days

Dear Cole,
Daddy is in Virginia working this week. It's just you and me buddy. Tonight, after we finished reading and we were cuddling, I asked you what was the first memory you have. You said it was being at the zoo and peeing in the bushes. I remember that too. Then you took over.

cole: Do you remember what house you grew up in?
me: yes, I grew up in the house that Grandma lives in.
cole: was it in black and white or color?
me: not sure what you mean.
cole: you know, was it back in the old days, like black and white [photos]?
me: I'm not that old Cole. You think I look like I'm a 100 years old?
cole: you do look like an old lady.

Then, I had to tickle you because we have the best conversations. And after you're sound asleep, I grew sad because one of my first memories was when I was probably 5 and it saddens me to know that you won't remember most of our first six years together when you are old like me. We have just had so many wonderful times and watching you grew up and try new things and learn so much ---makes me proud and sad at the same time. I hope this blog and your photo books show you how happy we were...how happy we are.

I love you.
Mom

Skate City

Darling,

Somehow the permission slip for Skate City never made it home so I promised to take you the next day. Here is our day in pictures. Cesar, Sofia and Daddy came too. It was so much fun.

Because I care about people

Dear Cole,
Last week after we got home from school and work, you and I took Estes for a walk. I asked how lunch was because it was pizza day. When school makes pizza for lunch, you don't bring your own. It's one of a few offerings you like. Anyhow, Daddy loves school pizza and he was telling you during breakfast how much he loves school pizza and that you should bring him home a piece - BUT I didn't hear this conversation.

Back to our walk.

me: How was lunch?
cole: AWE, it was sooo good. I got seconds, but I didn't eat the second piece. I wrapped it in tinfoil and saved it for Dad.
me: (heart full of happiness because that is just so thoughtful): That is so thoughtful Cole.
cole: It's because I care about people. I know how much Dad loves school pizza so I wanted to bring him home a piece. It's nice to think about other people.
me: Where is the pizza?
cole: In my backpack.

Then we continued talking about doing things and giving things to people, about not being selfish all the time, and about how he "cares about people".

We finished our hike and I checked your backpack. No pizza!

me: Cole, I don't see the pizza. Are you sure you brought a pizza home?
cole: I must have been mistaken.

So, there you have it. It's the thought that counts I guess.

Love you baby,
mommy

p.s. Funny comment after three hours of playing Halo with Daddy.
me: Cole, why are your eyes so red?
cole: Because I didn't blinked at all today.

ValentiMe's

Dear Cole,

Happy Valentime's Day. That's not a spelling mistaken. You actually say Val-en-times. It's so freakin cute. I made cupcakes for your class and a special heart cake for you. I surprised you with it this morning. Daddy made you lunch and drew a funny face on wrapping to your ding dong and I made you a homemade card. You brought both up while you sitting on the pot tonight and you said, "that face was so cute on my ding dong" and I pointed to your dad because he drew it and you said "he is so special." Awwwww! My sweet baby.

Daddy made his stuffed chicken breasts for dinner. We had twice baked potatoes, asparagus, & champagne. You even toasted and had a shot of champagne with us. We only eat this meal once a year on Valentines Day and it is just so delicious. Thanks for making it with love Daddy. You made this dinner 9 years ago on Valentine's when we first started going out. Awwwww! How romantic.

Sofia brought you a present and a card last night and invited you over for dinner. It was really sweet. Then you made her a card took it over to her tonight and it read:

Valentine Valentine
Won't you be my Valentine
Please be my Valentine
Alright

So, that pretty much sums up our Valentine's Day. Oh, and how cute is the shirt Grandma made you? It says Be My Valentine and then under the girl is says Gma and under the boy it says Cole. Shari, our neighbor, even brought over some treats for us. So thoughtful.

We all love you lots and lots and lots.

XOXO,
Mommy

p.s. you said something funny the other day - Estes was playing around with you and I was in the bathroom getting ready and i heard you say, "She's nibbling my balls!" It was really funny.

Smarties

Dear Cole,

Lets talk about Parent Teacher Conference. But first, we have to go back to October conferences when you were still learning what it meant to behave like a 1st grader, how great your reading was, but how much focus and listening were a problem for you. How hard it was for me to hear these things but how I knew them to be true. Daddy made sure to tell your teacher that it's important to challenge you because boredom is an enemy and make the brightest students seem unruly.

OK, fast forward four months. You've learned what it means to behave like a 1st grader, you are on the fast track with reading, progressing by leaps and bounds, your work with math and numbers and patterns comes easy, and Mrs.O'hara can see glimpses of when you push your skills and knowledge to the absolute max. I wanted to cry in October because I knew you could be more and I wanted to cry last week because I knew you were proving you could be more. She has recommended you for the Gifted and Talented program at Emerald and Daddy and I talked to you about it and you agreed that you'd like to be in the program too. We are so proud of you darling. I mean, center-of-our-soul proud.

Next up, Valentine's Day - you celebrated yesterday at school with a sandwich making party and exchanged cards with your classmates. You made homemade cards - they were awesome; butterflies for the girls and aliens for the boys. The day left you exhausted and you were sound asleep by 6:30.

This morning, you crawled in the bed with me as I woke up and Daddy joined us and we just laid around, giving kisses and hugs, petting Estes, being goofy, and snuggling. It was all ruined after about half an hour when Estes farted and we all fled.

Today, after we went to see Gnomeo and Juliet and run errands with Daddy, you worked on clearing the gutters for the majority of the block so the water could flow to the drains. It was back breaking work, lifting those heavy pieces of ice, but you did it for nearly 2 hours. After a hot bath and some food, you've just been relaxing.

At the movies today, the showtime we wanted was sold out, so we were offered one 10-minutes later with the caveat that it was a special showing for kids with autism so it would be a little different experience. Before we went in, I explained what autism was by talking about your classmate Dakota and that the theater wouldn't be as dark and the movie not as loud as we are use to and that kids may be talking and walking around. You were great....and they were great.

I'm just so proud of the little person you are - your character, your wit, your love, your smarts.

Big hugs,

Mommy

Pacing and ice cream

Cole,
Tonight you went to dinner with Sofia, Cesar, and Dena. I didn't know what to do with myself. After pacing around for a bit I decided to run to the store to get milk and then I made my way to dairy queen. Really? It's zero degrees outside and I'm going to eat ice cream? Yep. That's exactly what I did.

Then I came home, ate it and paced some more before deciding to pick up the house bit. It's too quiet without you. I miss you. Come home so we can argue about getting ready for bed. Mostly, come home so I can snuggle and cuddle with you and read a book together.

I love you,
Mommy

Car ride and deep thoughts

On the way to Grandma's yesterday morning:

mom - "Cole, what's wrong? You seem sad."
cole - "Well, it's just that I miss my fish. You remember Shrek?" (now BIG tears coming down his face
mom- "of course I do. What made you think of Shrek?"
cole - "I was thinking about the movie and then I just thought about my fish."
mom - "do you remember what color he was?"
cole - "gold?"
mom - "purple."
cole - "who gave him to me?"
mom - "remember Mark and Sue? They gave him to you for your second birthday. He lived for two years. Dad cleaned the tank and you fed him. He was a good fish."
cole - "it's just that I miss him." (still big, sad tears)
mom- "Well, it's ok to be sad. Even though he's gone, he still lives in your heart."
cole - "I've lost three things in my life - Shrek, Soft Bunny, and Nilla."
cole - "I keep them alive in my heart."
mom - "not bad for being almost 7."

cole - "how will I find you heaven?" //now, I'm about ready to cry//
mom - "they have a front desk. you just ask for me and they will tell where to go."
cole - "can you find anyone that way?"
mom- "yep and when I get to heaven, I'm going to ask for my grandpa, Virgil."
cole - "I don't want you to die."
mom - "I don't want to die yet either."
cole - "what I am suppose to do when you die. you're my family, we're suppose to stay together."
mom - "well, hopefully I'll die when I'm old and you will be all grown up and have a life of your own."
cole - "But I will miss you."
cole - "will we have our hotel room in heaven?"
mom - "yep. we'll have our hotel room in heaven."

cole - "I don't want to talk about death anymore."
mom - "I agree."
cole - "I know I brought it up and all."

You are my sweet angel.

You were a snuggle bug with grandma which is so special to her. You two played cards and games and watched a movie while I went for a long run. Then we all went to the store and out for lunch. It was nice spending time with grandma. Since the weather was bad, we didn't end up going to Nederland, instead we started your valentine card project and watched a movie together. Then, we snuggled and giggled ourselves to sleep.

Goodnight darling,
Mommy

Sink

You've always loved playing in the sink. Last night, you asked if you could play in the sink with the dishes and some soap. It was cute to watch you wash the dishes and I think you asked me if I wanted a bite of your bubble chili. Yummy!

Today, I saw a movie called Biutiful and I was so touched by the man's love for his children. He was dying but he didn't want to leave them. I thought of you many times during the movie and how much love I have for you, how I can't imagine ever leaving you. I love you so much. Thank you for being my son.

I just laid you down for sleep and you gave me 50 kisses. Pure sweetness.

Good Night,

Mommy

School Closed

Darling,
School was closed yesterday and today because of the cold temperatures. We had adventures in my office yesterday. You love putting in the secret combination to get in the building and then using the secret card key to open the doors. You watched a movie while I was in a very long meeting. At some point, you visited with Nick and somehow made your way out with a yo yo and his plastic gun with darts. I taught you to stand on a chair to yo yo so that the string had room to drop. You practiced a lot yesterday and mastered it. You are now officially a yo yo'er. What else did you do? You helped Daniel with a real work project, interviewed Terre on camera while I tested out our new studio equipment, signed an important document, played hangman with Terre, scored some candy from Whitney and Vikki, and well, for the most part were pretty good....for a six year old.

So, when we heard school was canceled again for today, we invite Fia over for a slumber party. You guys must have been tired because you didn't do the usual late night chatting. In the morning, Cesar took you to the Childrens Museum where you were gone most of the day. Awesome for me because I put in six solid hours of work which was desperately needed.

We survived two canceled days of school and now we're almost ready for the weekend. I need to schedule some playdates...Umple Joe - here we come.

Love you baby doll,
Mama

Hiking: Devils Backbone

My darling Cole,
Today we went for a family hike out near Loveland at a place called Devils Backbone. We made it to the keyhole for some great views. You didn't complain too much, especially once we started to play spies and throw grenades (aka rocks) into the tall grass where the evil scrogers were hanging out.
Then we had lunch at Sonic, played video games with dad while I finished the movie The Girl Who Kicked the Hornets Nest. Then you and I went to the library and checked out 14 books all for you. WOW! After we got home Sofia came over and you guys played until dinner was ready. After dinner, we went over to Uncle Derrick's house to visit with Gramie while she babysat the kids. Then, it was back home and off to sleep. Geez, it was a busy weekend.

I love you baby boy. Sweet dreams.
Mommy

Busy

Dear Cole,
I'll catch you up from the last couple of days. Thursday G-ma came over for dinner. It was so nice having her over. Friday, we celebrated the end of a long week by having dinner at Ted's. Yummy!

Saturday, I ran a 12-miler, you played Halo with daddy, then it was errands with me. We hit the gas station, car wash, cleaners, yummy lunch at Bean & Berry, Old Navy, the candy store, grocery shopping and finally, Baskin Robbins for build-your-own-sundae.

When we got home, it was bike riding, baseball, quite time movie time, dinner, and finally sleep. It was a gorgeous day out and we made good use of it.

Thanks for hanging out with me.

I love you,
Mommy

How may I help you?

Dear Cole,

We cleaned out one of the closets downstairs and you wanted to keep all sorts of things we were getting rid of like a book called "How to deal with NASTY people", old credit cards that you put in your wallet, and this headset. You wore this thing ALL day long, even while watching TV or reading or eating. You thought it was the coolest thing ever.

It reminded me of when I was little and thought that about my mom's stuff. Or like the time Uncle Derrick and I got caught stealing office supplies from my dad's office. What in the world did we want or need with a stapler and other like items at the age of 8? Fascinated by new things that really had no applicability or use to use but were somehow the most intriguing things ever.

Last week when we got home from school, you asked if you could wear a costume and so you were Ironman all night. Speaking of super heros, daddy took you to see the Green Hornet while I was in San Francisco. You guys also made an incredible carousel with your Kinetics.

At school, you've been working on writing letters, actual letters, one of my favorite things ever. You wrote me this note:

Drire Mom,
I miss you. I wot to kom with you. I love you. XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX.
Love,
Cole

Or how about this one:
I no that you are a lover to me and you are so sweeat you always say that you are gonna eat my cheeks.

You packed me off for my trip to New Orleans with a special note that I could only open at the airport. It read "I love you mommy" and you had a plastic heart attached to it.

I love you my darling. I'm looking forward to spending a lot of time with you this weekend. I've missed you.

By the way, thank you for surprising me by getting my toothbrush ready twice this week. My sweet boy.

Goodnight,
Mommy

Mornings

Dear Cole,
There are some mornings, when things just don't go smoothly. It usually happens the instant you wake up. We all have days like that and boy, are they challenging.

But this morning, you were an angel. No arguing, no pouting, no asking three or four times for you to do something. You were just heavenly. Because I'm leaving for New Orleans today and had extra time this morning, we decided to walk to school. But it wasn't any walk. We pretended that we were hikers, high up in the mountains, dodging crevasses, and sliding on ice. You kept calling me "friend". You'd say "be careful friend." The school was the top of the mountain. We reached our destination, gave awesome hugs and kisses.

Before we parted ways, you reminded me that you left something special in my backpack for my trip and told me to look for it when I got to the airport. You are so sweet. Have fun with daddy this weekend.

Hugs,
Mommy

The Simple Life

Dear Cole,

Happy New Year! I just wanted to write and tell you thank you. Thank you for helping me be silly and goofy. You love being goofy and silly. Sometimes after a long day at work, it's hard to switch gears from being so serious and stressed to being silly and goofy.

Life is simple right now. You love to spend time with me and daddy. After I get over my serious self, we play sheriff and robber - having shootouts down the hall and capturing the robber and putting him in jail. Or how about hide-n-seek! Simply a favorite of yours. Or board games or cards. Or chase...you never get tired of playing chase. Or how about tickle...you love to play tickle and we just laugh and laugh. I love to hear you laugh.

It's hard to play sometimes because it takes some effort, energy, and imagination but it's good for my soul. I need it. To see you smile and giggle and be happy is precious. Tonight, we had a carpet picnic where we ate hot dogs and spicy fries and watched Spongebob. Thanks for hanging out with me. I love you so much. Thanks for being such an awesome 6 year old.

As I tucked you in bed tonight you said,"The first thing I like about you is your smile. The second thing is your singing." That was of course after you read me a book and I sang you a lullaby.

Good night darling. I love you.
Mommy

2010 Movies

Cole,

Here are most of the movies you saw in the theater this year:

The Spy Next Door
The Tooth Fairy
Percy Jackson and The Olympians
Alice In Wonderland
Diary of a Wimpy Kid
How to Train your Dragon
Furry Vengence
Marmaduke
Alpha & Omega
Iron Man 2
Clash of the Titans
Shrek Forever After
The Karate Kid
Toy Story 3
The Last Airbender
Despicable Me
Cats & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore
Nanny McPhee Returns
Guardians of GaHoole
MegaMind
Tangled
The Chronicles of Narnia
Yogi Bear


I might have missed acouple. We saw Chronicles of Narnia with Uncle Joe and Michael a few weekends ago and after we got out of the movie, there was a table set up to build the Narnia ship, Dawn Treader. Here are some shots.




















Love you baby,
Mommy

Christmas 2010

Dear Cole,

Wow! What a Christmas! We got a box full of games from Grandpa Jack and Grandma Carol that kept us occupied. You got a PaperJams guitar and amp from Santa that you played and filled our house with music. You got a Ball Wizard kit (you make your own bouncy balls....and it WORKED) from Grandma that I'm going to say was your favorite gift followed by your Snake Eyes mask and sword. You got a couple new hats which you look AWESOME in. And about a million other toys. We had fun watching you go through your stocking and opening your presents. Mom and Dad didn't make out to bad either. Thanks CV for all my "perfect" gifts.

But most of all, thank you for our family. It is the most precious gift of all.

Christmas Eve 2010

We had a very Merry Christmas Eve with Grandma and Grandma, Uncle Derrick, Aunt Veronica, Eliana and Parker. Grandma and Grandpa made yummy beef stroganoff. I ate too much. We opened presents and then we headed outside to put some food down for the reindeer. Next, was some family snapshots and then we loaded up and walked down to Aunt Donna's house for some delicious desserts and a visit from Santa.

Putting some magical oats out for the reindeer. Visit from Santa Nice Cole...any idea what he was so excited out?

Thanks for all the great food and gifts and company.

Life

Dear World,

Well, I've finally caught up on some blogging. The past seven weeks have been challenging, both personally and professionally. I have been struggling with finding clarity, balance, motivation and at the same time trying to be resilient and let things go. It's been a struggle and well, when life gets you down, it's sometimes hard to be happy.

These are the times that allow us to grow, to develop, to become more. So, I'll embrace it, even though it's hard as hell and I'll most likely cry some more tears. But, my happy blog lives. It's my place to see how beautiful and wonderful life is and all the people in it....all the people in my world.

Be thankful for the little things, everyday. They keep people going. Last weekend Cole called out from his bed in the morning "Mom? Can I come snuggle with you?" Who could ever resist. He climbed in, his body warm and soft and wrapped himself around me like a cocoon. It was a sweet moment that I've taken myself back to several times this week.

I'm going to practice what a wise woman once told me - "Rest in the unknown". It's hard to find peace in that, but I'm going to try.

Good night,

me

Gilpin Cty Fair x 6

We decorated the house right after Thanksgiving. All the gifts have been bought and most I've already wrapped. We're definitely ready for Christmas. But, nothing beats our holiday tradition of going to the Gilpin County Holiday Fair with Rachel, Sierre, and Ryder.

This was our 6th year watching the kids get their face painted, sitting on Santa's lap, decorating cookies, and making hand prints. They were even excited to look at the craft fair this year - they stopped by every booth, curious to see what had been made and even get some samples of yummy treats.

Here's to traditions! See our day in pictures.